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Mahal na regalo

Ngayong Pasko, naisip ko na higit pa sa pagbibigay ng regalo o damit o pagkain ang pwede nating gawin para maparamdam ang pagmamahal natin sa kapwa. Siguro mas mahalagang regalo na matatanggap ng mga mahal natin sa buhay ay pagpapatawad at yung assurance na mamahalin natin sila at sasamahan kahit ano pang mangyari.

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Tsktsktsk.

Ayoko pero gusto ko.
Na-eenjoy ko kasi.
Sorry na.

Oops, hala, seryoso ba?
Wag ganun.
Chummy lang ito.
Or not.
Mukhang big deal na.

Gusto kong sabihing walang effect sa akin, pero di yun totoo.

Nauubos oras ko, as in literal na oras.
Ang tagal kong bumangon, nakaka-guilty na.

Di ko magawa yung mga dapat kong gawin.
Hindi na nakakatulong, nakaka-distract talaga.

Okay lang naman daw basta in moderation.

Pero pag na-eenjoy na, kaya pa bang i-moderate lang?
Mahirap yun. Mahirap kontrolin ang sarili.

Anyare sayo, Jas?
Saan mo hinahanap ang saya?

Diba sabi mo, Sa Diyos hanapin ang kaligayahan?

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Thanks for the hug

It was my first day in graduate school and I had some questions: Will it be fun? Will it be difficult? Can I handle it?

I was sitting in the bus, with my sister, Ate Win. We talked about our new chapters in life–her new job as a lecturer and my new endeavor as a graduate student. We were both excited and nervous because we do not know what to expect.

Before going down the bus, my supportive sister hugged me tightly. That warm hug made me feel empowered and reminded me I am not alone. Thanks for that hug!

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Looking back on my teacher days

When asked to introduce myself, I usually say, I was a Math teacher. I always say that because I am proud to be a teacher. And I do feel happy remembering my teacher life.

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Yes, I was a Math teacher. I taught for two years in the school where I graduated elementary and high school. Being co-teachers with my former teachers was one of the things I see as an accomplishment in life haha. Yea, it was heartwarming to teach alongside the teachers who taught me the basics in school and in life. Of course I also had young co-teachers, many of us were fresh graduates from college, and that made it easier for us to relate with each other and become good friends!

I experienced many things in my two years of teaching— I taught Math to Grade 5, 6, and 8 students, tried teaching music, arts, play, and other stuff to Preschool Education college students, coached for Math contests, revived the Math Club, joined storytelling contests, read children’s story books to students and teachers on random days, launched my Encouragement Project, played ukulele during events, sort-of mentored practicum students in teaching, made friends with my fellow teachers and staff, enjoyed being a supportive adviser to Grade 6-Industry for their dance and sports endeavors, and many many more! Hayyy, looking back on those good days always makes my heart flutter. I truly love teaching, I really do. I love sharing my time, efforts, knowledge, ideas, and whatever I have to people who might benefit from it. Oh, indeed, I miss teaching!

Writing this confirms in my heart that indeed, teaching is my thing. It is what I love doing. It is what I would want to do even with little pay. It is what I want to be doing when I grow old. I hope I could go back to teaching someday. 🙂

You may ask, What triggered these thoughts, Jas? Don’t you enjoy your work as a Bible translator?

Haha, not that I do not enjoy my present work. I enjoy translating, yes, it’s true. I also like the relationship I have with my teammates and with our consultant. It’s just that uhm, well, okay. I visited my school today and bonded with my favorite teacher. She toured me in the school, and the memories, plus the feelings, just came rushing in! The school environment made me excited. The people, the place, the atmosphere! Haaaaay.

Since I left teaching, many have asked what I will do now with my Math skills. I always say, we’ll see. I might go back to teaching someday. Let me just finish this project. I really like this project that I’m working on that’s why I cannot let it go. 🙂 We’ll see, guys. If teaching is meant for me, I will surely go back to teaching. Someday. Don’t you worry, friends.

Again, don’t get me wrong. I love what I do now as a translator. Teaching and translating are two things I cannot compare. They are special in their own ways. Maybe my emotions were just triggered haha. I guess, I am just being raw and honest right now. Obviously, this is just how I feel right now. Ooooh haha.

Why so defensive, Jas? Hahaha.

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Keep me near

Jesus keep me near to Your heart
For outside of You I’m lost
Draw me in the tide of Your will
Lead me as I yield myself to You
Keep me near Your heart
Keep me near Your heart

Rescue me in weakness of mind
When distraction conquers me
Keep me in Your shadow oh Lord
Give me grace to follow where You lead
Keep me near Your heart
Keep me near Your heart

For You are everything that is beautiful
And You are all that I long to see in me
You are everything that is beautiful
Breathe Your desires in me

Keep me in the place where You are
For Your presence is my joy
Break my selfish nature and pride
Mould a life of loyalty to You
Keep me near Your heart
Keep me near Your heart

Form in us a heart of divine beauty